A World Apart
by deanandhisimpala
Summary: Loki's been banished to Earth, and he's been forced to live with the Avengers. To make matters worse, he really doesn't understand this new planet. At all. Thor doesn't either, but he'll always protect his little brother. Features all the Avengers. You won't find slash here.
1. Chapter 1

**I've seen The Avengers three times now, and it just keeps getting better. I love it. I LOVE IT. So I decided to try my hand at writing something for it. Let's see how it goes! By the way, ****besides reading plenty of mythology books that featured Thor and Loki as a kid, I've never read the comics. So if something's not right, please overlook it. This is just for fun :)**  


**So I'm going with the idea that Loki's been banished to Earth as punishment, without his power, and he has to live with the Avengers, in Stark Tower. Thor's dividing his time between Earth and Asgard. **

**This is rated T for mild language, in case that's not your thing.**

X

Loki's not sure he's ever felt a pain quite like this before. His skin is too tight, feels stretched thin over bones that suddenly feel much too large. There aren't any open wounds, but it feels like there should be – skin scraped off to expose raw, sensitive flesh underneath. But nothing. Just painful, painful skin across his shoulders, back, arms, and even chest.

He lays flat on his back in bed and takes deep, calming breaths. Even the cool, light touch of the sheets against his skin is like razor blades, so he lays there with nothing over him. Lucky it's a warm night. He shifts his left arm ever so slightly, and curses softly. Even the shirt he's wearing, a soft, thin material, feels like sandpaper against his shoulders. _What. Is. Wrong with me? What fresh hell is this? _

_Go to sleep, Loki. Ignore it. _

But he can't. He doesn't usually sleep on his back, he sleeps on his stomach, with his arms under his pillow. He can't lay like that now. Just lifting his arms up is like knives are cutting his shoulders right where they bend. So it's this. Laying on his back in this damn dark room in this damn Stark tower, hating everything.

How could a simple trip to the – what was it Stark had called it? Party Beach? – go so wrong? He's beginning to suspect that the "good time" he'd been promised had been a ploy for something much darker. Otherwise, these humans have a very strange concept of what is a 'good time'. _Curse them all. _

As if on cue, loud, raucous laughter echoes through the tower. Loki squeezes his eyes shut and glares at the back of his eyelids. _How is one supposed to sleep in this racket? _

To be fair, it is early. But when they got back, he'd felt so sick and hurt he'd just headed straight for his room. _They could have a little respect. My door is closed. _

"HAHAHAHAHA!" Agent Barton's laugh makes him jump a mile. "I just whooped your ASS! Looooooooooooser." There's a quiet sort of rumble that sounds as though it might be Captain America's voice, then Clint's again. "Dude, I don't care if you've never played a single video game before. I still whooped your ass." Clint laughs again, and Loki opens his eyes and glares at the ceiling instead.

He's had enough. He gets up, wincing at the movement, and goes to the bathroom. _How do you make the light appear again?_ "Damn these strange mechanisms," he whispers. Some sort of strange switch. He fumbles on the wall for it, and bright lights flick on overhead. He turns toward the mirror and – "What in the nine realms...!" He gapes at his reflection.

His skin, usually so perfectly ivory white, is bright, painful, angry red. He stares in horror. "Even my _face." _All of it. "What – what happened?" He's barely aware he's talking to himself. Gigantic blue eyes stare in frightened silence out at him. He lifts his shirt – same thing there. He gingerly touches the livid skin with his fingertips, it feels like an open wound. _Breathe, Loki. _He glares at his bedroom door viciously. _They did this. They planned this, somehow. I know it. If Thor were here... _

Loki has often thought Thor can read his mind, because he always seems to show up when Loki needs him most or, on the flip side, when he _really_ doesn't want to see him, and this time is no different. A very familiar booming voice rings out two seconds later.

"Friends! Greetings! How goes it?"

Loki can just see his brother in his mind's eye – red cape flowing, blue eyes shining, ridiculous grin plastered on. He rolls his eyes, even though it's actually comforting to hear Thor's voice. And that thought surprises him, but suddenly he's very, very glad that Thor has finally shown up. Thor will know what to do, Thor will keep him safe. And he hates it, but it's true. He cocks his head and listens as his brother's friends all murmur greetings.

"I trust you have all had a pleasant day?"

"Yeah, we went to the beach!" Steve sounds ten years old. Loki rolls his eyes again. These people.

"The Party Beach?" Thor sounds thrilled, and also a little put out. "You did not go without me, friends!"

"Come on Goldilocks. You were off wherever it is you go all the time and we wanted to swim. It was hot." Tony's voice.

"Ah, I suppose I cannot complain. Next time though, I will accompany you. Where is my brother? Did he also go to the Party Beach with you?"

"He sure did." Agent Barton's voice. "Dude looks like he hasn't seen the sun in about five hundred years."

Loki glares at the door.

"Where is my brother?" Thor asks again. He pounds on the door. "Brother? Are you awake?"

Loki turns off the light and opens the door a crack. "Well if I was not before, I am now, seeing as you are incapable of being quiet. What do you want?" He's secretly pleased to see his brother – his good, strong, familiar brother – but it will never do to show him that.

Thor edges closer. "Why are you in here, brother? Why do you not drink and make merry with the others?"

"I would rather choke on my own blood than socialize with those people," Loki replies coldly. Sure, it's a little uncalled for, and also untrue, but he's tired and he's hurt and he's pretty sure he's dying.

Thor doesn't look shocked at his comment. "What is wrong, brother? Something bothers you."

"A lot bothers me," Loki snaps quietly. "I have no magic, I must live with those oafs night and day, and I may or may not have been the victim of some very dark magic, but other than that, nothing at all bothers me, Thor."

"Dark magic?" Thor puts his hand on the door, starts pushing a little. Loki is all too aware of the other Avengers watching curiously in the background, and has to lean all his weight against the door to keep it from opening. "What do you mean, Loki?" He's serious now, blue eyes shining with concern.

Loki gives up. Some part of him – okay, most of him – wants his brother's attention, wants to tell his brother what's going on. "Well if you are going to come in, be quick about it!" He steps back, and Thor shoves open the door, barreling in like a giant.

"You worry me, brother. What dark magic do you speak of?"

Loki flicks on the light, and Thor lets out a roar of rage. Natasha lets out a quickly stifled scream from the other room. "Brother! What in Odin's name happened to you?" He starts to reach for Loki, but one brush of his rough fingers and Loki hisses in pain, pulling back. "For the love of Asgard, do not touch me!"

Thor draws back his hand, his face thunderous. "Who has done this to you, Loki? Tell me, and I will make sure they regret it, I swear to you."

"I hope you are being honest when you say that. It was your friends, brother, whom you speak so highly of." Loki can't help a little smile of triumph as Thor's face falls.

"They did this to you? Why would they do such a thing?"

"I do not pretend to know their evil minds," Loki replies, looking at the floor.

Thor is silent for a moment, and then he touches Loki's arm gently. "I will keep my word, Loki. They will regret it. No one harms my brother without facing my wrath. But tell me, what did they do? I was not aware any of my friends knew how to cast magic spells."

"I do not know how they did it. They took me to this – place. It was very bright and there was water and sand."

Thor's face clears abruptly. "The Party Beach! I know of it. I visited it before with Captain Steve. Nothing so grievous happened to me there, brother. It was actually quite pleasant. We played a very amusing game, some sort of ball, and I lost badly." He chuckles in memory,and Loki glares. Thor clears his throat. "That is all that occurred today?"

"That is all." Loki sighs. He's starting to feel sick again, and his skin burns like fire.

Thor sighs too. "Come with me, brother. I will confront them."

Loki plants his feet. "Must I? I would rather they not see me in this... condition."

"Loki. Come with me." Thor puts a gentle arm around his shoulders, and Loki finds himself giving in. He follows his brother out of the bedroom, and the effect on the room is immediate.

"Oh holy sh..." Then laughing. Clint.

"Whoooa, am I wearing my rose-coloured glasses again, or do you guys see that too?" Tony.

"I thought I knew before what it was like to 'see red' but now I'm not so sure." Bruce.

Natasha hisses in sympathy, and Steve is staring open-mouthed.

"Oh good. I thought I was just raging drunk." Tony again.

Loki finds himself shivering under Thor's arm. Being the center of attention is only fun if it's for something good. He hates it when it's for the wrong reasons, and he hates being embarrassed. He also hates feeling pathetic. Every one of those things is happening right now.

"Please, friends. I want to know which one of you felt it would be a good idea to hurt my brother in this fashion." Thor's voice is quiet, but there's danger behind it, and Loki presses a little closer. "I can assure you I do not find it amusing, and I will not tolerate it."

"I can tell you right now, Hammer Time, none of us did that to your baby bro." Tony's smiling, but he looks the tiniest bit sympathetic.

"Then who?" Thor growls.

"That'd be the sun," Steve puts in gently.

"DO I LOOK IN A GAMING MOOD?" Thor roars, and everyone jumps. "THE SUN DOES NOT DO SUCH THINGS!" Tony has spilled his drink all over himself. Loki can't help smirking.

"I guess none of us thought of it, but we thought he already knew." Steve crosses his arms.

Thor relaxes just the tiniest bit. "Knew what, friend Steve?"

"About getting sunburned." Steve shifts uncomfortably. "I was wearing sunscreen, I put it on before I left the house. I didn't even think to ask if anyone else needed it. Everybody usually takes care of that stuff themselves."

"The _sun _did this to my brother?" Thor glares at the ceiling as though he can see the sun through it. "This is no time to jest. The sun does not do such things that I am aware of. And what is this sunscreen you speak of?"

"The sun is different where you guys are from, I'm guessing," Bruce says. "You've never got burned there?"

"Never!" Thor is indignant. "Also, the sun did not do this to me when I visited the Party Beach, and I was not wearing this screen of the sun which you speak of."

Tony chuckles. "Welcome to our world. You got pale skin, you get burned. You're a bit more ready for the sun, I think, Days of Thunder, than Rudolph there."

Loki glares at him from under Thor's arm. He can't think of anything to say, which doesn't happen often. "My name is not Rudolph," he says finally.

Tony shrugs. "I know."

"That is the nastiest sunburn I've ever seen," Clint says, and Loki can tell he's trying not to laugh.

"I can assure you it is probably much 'nastier' than you even know, Agent Barton," he snaps. "I cannot even lay down properly." To his horror, tears are threatening at the back of his eyes. It's one of the things he hates most about himself – when he gets very mad, he cries. It's never useful in any situation, and immediately cancels out most of the fear he is trying to instill.

Thor, who knows him better than Loki likes to admit, senses it immediately and pulls him closer. "Is there no way to be rid of this awful redness?"

Loki gives in, feeling safe – if not exactly happy – against his big brother's side, and leans his forehead on Thor's shoulder, concentrating on controlling his emotions.

"Vinegar," Natasha speaks up. "It works for me, always has. I burn pretty badly too. Redhead, what can I say. I'm lucky."

"Vinegar?" Thor raises his eyebrows. "I know nothing of this word."

"You put it on your french fries, you know?" Clint acts out pouring vinegar on fries.

"I know nothing of french..."

"Wait just one second." Natasha runs to the kitchen and comes back a moment later with a bottle. "Here you go. Put it on gently, it might sting a little. But in the morning it'll feel better."

"I thank you, my lady." Thor eyes the bottle slightly suspiciously.

"Don't worry, won't kill him," Tony grins. "And he'll smell good enough to eat after."

Thor glares. "I do hope you are jesting."

"Am I wearing a joker's hat or something?" Tony stands up suddenly, wobbling a little. "Ugh. I suddenly feel like I'm gonna puke. It's weird."

Steve smiles angelically. "I guess I should've warned you I can't get drunk before we started that drinking contest."

X

"Do stand still, brother." Thor is patting the strong-smelling liquid all over his shoulders.

Loki frowns, which also hurts. "I wish to leave this place, Thor. Your friends laugh at my pain."

Thor looks uncomfortable. "But they did help you, brother."

"That remains to be seen. This may be just another of their pranks, like taking me to this Party Beach and allowing me to cook like a side of meat." Loki knows he's sulking, but he can't help it.

"I believe it was a mistake, Loki. Besides, you of all people should understand the fun of a little prank."

"I have never done something so vindictive," Loki lies. "I would never, either."

Thor laughs. "Go to bed, brother. You do get grumpy when you are weary."

"I am not weary," Loki snaps, stifling a yawn.

He still has to lay on his back, but Thor sits on the bed next to him and begins talking, telling him about his day in Asgard.

Loki is asleep within minutes.

**X  
**

**Please let me know what you thought! It would be much appreciated. :)  
**

**I'm thinking of maybe writing more of them, turning it into a series of stories in which Loki and Thor are confused by things on Earth. We'll see how it goes!  
**

**Thanks for reading!**


	2. Chapter 2

**First, big thanks to everyone who reviewed the first chapter! It means a lot!**

**Here's the second chapter - I hope you enjoy it as much as the first :)  
**

**Again, rated T for some language.  
**

**X  
**

"I need a drink," Tony says dryly, standing up and heading for the bar. "Anyone else want anything?"

They're all sitting around in Stark Tower, watching the odd, confusing box full of moving pictures. Loki is fascinated by it, although he tries not to show it. He's curled up on the couch next to Thor, who is sitting like a king, straight and tall, hands on his knees, chuckling heartily every now and then when something amusing happens on the screen.

Loki is trying as hard as he can to figure out just how the picture appears on the screen, but he can't, and he's definitely not asking, not these tiresome people. Plus, he's very comfortable here, with his big brother beside him. When Thor is not here, he always feels vaguely under threat, sure that at any moment someone will attack him. Therefore right now, he's just being quiet and not drawing attention to himself, enjoying the peace and feeling of safety that results in having his big brother in such close proximity.

Only Clint and Steve are here tonight with them, Bruce is off being a doctor and Natasha is on a mission for SHIELD. It's raining outside, and altogether is rather cozy inside.

"I would like a drink, if you please, friend Stark." Thor manages to take his eyes away from the screen. "I wish to have one of those – what do you call it – Driver of Screws?"

"A Screwdriver. You really butcher words, don't you?" Tony rolls his eyes, but he looks amused. "Anything for you, Baby Bro?"

Loki narrows his eyes. "I do not appreciate that title. It has been quite some time since I were anything resembling a baby." He rubs the back of his neck irritably. Stark really does have a talent for pushing his buttons.

"Whatever. Don't think about it too much. Come on, make it fast."

Loki hesitates.

" While we're still young, Loki." Tony's hand hovers over the rows of bottles, waiting expectantly.

"I know none of the refreshment you have here," Loki replies. He hates admitting it, but in this case, it would probably be worse to just ask for anything. He has very refined tastes.

Tony stares at him for a moment. Then his eyes widen slightly and he starts to smile. "None of it? What do you drink back in Candyland?"

"It is called Asgard. And we drink ale. Or wine. Which does not appeal to me." Loki glares at Tony, daring him to mock him.

"Are you serious?" Clint is slouching nearby in a squishy chair. "You've never had whiskey, or vodka?"

Loki ignores him, flicking an imaginary speck of lint off his knee.

"Wine and ale is all we drink in Asgard," Thor says for him. "And Loki is fond of neither."

"Okay, I'm tired of standing here. I'm making you a Jack and Coke and if that's not okay, I'll drink it. End of story." Tony grabs a tall bottle with a black label off the counter.

Loki glances quickly at Thor, who shrugs, blue eyes sparkling. "Do not worry brother! It is great fun trying these new beverages. This – Screwdriver – is quite delicious. Last time we celebrated, I drank ten of them." He laughs heartily. "What is it Stark says? 'They go down so easy'. It is candy in a liquid form, apparently."

"Well, alright." He might feel unsafe drinking something they gave him if Thor were not here, but seeing as he is, they wouldn't dare do anything. Still, he gets up from his place of safety on the couch and goes to watch.

Tony looks slightly surprised to see him so close, but he doesn't hesitate. "See, here's the ice," he presses a button on the fridge next to him and it makes a loud whirring noise. Loki jumps about a foot in the air, and Tony starts to laugh. "Chill, dude. You're like a spring or something."

"I assure you, I am like nothing so calm as a spring." Loki glares at him, trying to slow his pounding heart. Stark has no clue how close he came to being killed. He does not need magic to kill someone.

"O-kay. Whatever you say. Anyway, here's the whiskey." Tony pours an amber coloured liquid over the ice, and then pops open a can of Coke, which also makes Loki jump. Tony starts to laugh again, but Loki's watching the can, wide-eyed, and barely seems to notice.

"Hey Thor? Your kid brother needs to get out more." Tony can't help smiling though at Loki's totally innocent – for once - wide eyes. "Okay, Puppy Eyes, take that and sit down. Don't say I never gave you anything. Anything for you, Captain Stoic?"

"No thanks," Steve says, slightly sadly. "There's not much point anymore. I'll just have water."

"Well you're just a barrel of fun and laughs. Catch." Tony tosses a bottle of water at Steve, who catches it one handed.

"I'm good with beer," Clint says, waving an already opened bottle at Tony.

"Cool. Here ya go, Blondie." He hands Thor a glass of something orange.

Loki sits next to his brother gingerly, curling his legs under him, and sniffs his drink. "The smell is strong."

"Drink it, little brother. If it is anything like this one, I can promise you a rewarding experience." Thor is already halfway through his own drink, grinning like a loon.

Loki's still unsure. It feels very wrong accepting something that the Man of Iron made for him. Sure, he watched him make it, but there's no being sure of anything around here. For all he knows, that strange metal can could have been full of something awful. The noise it made when it was opened – like poisonous gas escaping - is enough to worry him. Sure, Loki's been here for a couple of weeks already and they haven't poisoned him, but nothing says they never will. After all, Agent Barton still hasn't done anything in revenge, and Loki's sure that's coming sometime soon. He dreads that day, and prays Thor is someplace nearby when it does arrive.

He sniffs the glass again, trying to detect anything strange in the sharp scent.

He looks up to find Tony staring at him. "Are you being serious right now? You look like a cat scared of water. You're killing me. Just try it. I didn't put anything in it other than whiskey and Coke, you watched me. I swear. I'm not that kind of guy. If I wanted to kill you I'd do it with explosions, not sneaky like some kind of assassin. No offense." He points at Clint, who shrugs.

"Come on brother!" Thor claps him on the shoulder, and his drink almost spills all over.

"Do stop being such an oaf, Thor. I would rather not wear this drink." He takes a tentative sip, well aware of all the eyes on him, and is surprised to find that although it is rather strong, he likes the taste.

"Verdict?" Tony raises his eyebrows.

"It is acceptable, I suppose," Loki says, not meeting his eyes.

Thor laughs. "That is high praise from my brother, friend Stark! Well done. Now, let us watch one of these – what do you call it – films? I have much catching up to do, according to Agent Barton."

"So do I," Steve agrees. "What're we watching tonight, Tony?"

"I was thinking _Point Break_." Tony claps Thor on the back.

X

Ten minutes later, Loki's finished his drink, and he's surprised to find he actually wants another one. He doesn't want to ask though, so he just waits for Thor, who he knows will speak up soon. Thor never could go without a drink for long. Sure enough –

"Friend Stark! I am finished my drink. Would you mind very much getting me another? Or perhaps you could show me how to make it. I would like to learn." Thor grins hopefully, looking like a ten-year-old child.

"I bet you would. But the only person going near my bar is me. Sorry Bodhi." Tony pauses the film and gets up. "Anybody else want another one? Baby Bro? Clint?"

"I would," Loki says quietly, holding out his glass. He frowns. "...please."

Tony gapes at him. "Wow! Did I just hear you ask nicely? It's a miracle."

"I do not know whether you are being sarcastic or not," Loki replies coldly, ignoring Thor's proud smile beside him.

"To be honest, neither do I." Tony takes his glass. "Another JD and Coke, coming right up."

X

After his third drink, Loki is beginning to realize what Thor meant about the drinks 'going down easy'. He isn't having any trouble getting them down, not at all, and there's a pleasant warm, fuzzy feeling in his chest he cannot ever remember feeling before.

"Are you enjoying this film, brother?" Thor is grinning widely. "Humans do the most inane things, do they not? I find it fascinating."

Loki turns to look at his brother, and suddenly, Thor's big grin is hilarious. He starts to laugh. Thor turns and stares. "Brother? Why do you laugh?"

Loki covers his mouth with one hand, unable to even look at the others in the room. On the screen, someone falls off their surfboard, and he starts laughing harder.

"What's so funny?" Tony looks confused, and it just makes Loki laugh more. _Why has it never struck me before just how ridiculous Stark's beard is?_

Thor looks so baffled, Loki has to turn away. He physically cannot stop laughing. Clint starts to chuckle a second later, and then Tony joins in, slapping his hand on the arm of the chair.

"Dude, you are insane, but you're funny."

Steve has his head lowered, but he's laughing quietly. Thor stares around the room in confusion. "I do not see what is so amusing." But he starts to chuckle too.

They're all howling now, and Loki's stomach actually hurts he's laughing so hard. Every time he catches Thor's eye, it just starts up again. He can't remember the last time he laughed this hard.

"What – are – we laughing about?" Tony manages to squeak out, but no one can answer. Clint is on the floor, pounding it with his fist. Loki's never seen Steve smile so big. He's vaguely aware of his worries floating away on a sweet summer breeze.

X

It's a good five minutes later and suddenly Loki's just done laughing. They all stop, eyes watering. "You know," Tony wheezes, "You're not so bad after all, Blitzen."

Loki frowns at him. He can't remember what was so amusing. There's a strange heaviness coming over him now, like a dark cloud over the sun. All his troubles come back. _No magic. Stuck on Earth. Father banished me. _

"Whew." Tony starts up the movie again.

X

"Brother," Thor begins.

Loki , his fifth drink in hand, turns to look at his brother, and the room suddenly wobbles violently. He flings out an arm and grabs the side of the couch, eyes wide.

Thor eyes him, concerned. "Are you not well, brother? You are acting very strange tonight."

"I am fine." Loki blinks a couple of times. "I just had a strange sensation for a moment. I think it is gone."He leans forward to put down his glass, very carefully, and starts to stand up, then quickly sits back down. _Okay. Try again. _He stands very slowly, starts to walk, and the room spins in front of him like the Bifrost gone wrong. "Thor?" His voice wobbles.

"What is it, Loki?" Thor is at his side in a second.

Loki swallows hard. "Thor, I think Stark may have poisoned me after all."

"What do you mean?" Thor grabs his shoulder in alarm. "Why would you say such a thing?"

"I feel very strange." Loki puts a hand to his head. "I cannot walk properly." He's getting scared, his heart pounding in his chest. "The room spins, Thor. It will not stay still."

Thor gapes at the room in general, then at him. "The room is not moving for me, brother. Are you positive?" He studies Loki for a second. "You do look slightly flushed." He puts an arm around Loki's shoulders.

This does nothing to calm Loki. "Something is very wrong," he whispers, he's breathing very hard. He finds he's leaning on Thor quite heavily. "The insane laughter earlier, brother. I could not control it."

"Hey, what's going on? You guys are missing the movie." Tony's staring. Steve's so engrossed in the movie he doesn't even look up. Clint, on the other hand, does.

Thor glares at them. "I must ask, friend Stark, did you put something in my brother's drink?"

"Something other than alcohol, you mean? No." Tony smirks. "Why? Am I being framed for something again?"

"My brother is unwell."

Loki can't look at the other two men. His head feels light, too light for his body, and he clings to Thor's arm desperately. "Thor..."

"WHAT IS HAPPENING TO MY BROTHER?" Thor thunders, and everyone jumps, including Loki.

"Okay, okay! Chill!" Tony's eyes are huge. "What's going on, Hello Kitty? What are you feeling? Speak."

Loki leans closer to Thor, trying to gather his thoughts. For some reason, they seem to be scattered all over the place – he can't quite remember what he was supposed to be saying, or what Tony just asked. He blinks hard, and the room spins faster, Clint and Tony's faces smearing across his vision. In the end, all he can do is groan and bury his face in Thor's shoulder.

There's complete silence all around him. Even Tony seems to be at a loss for words. "My brother walks as though the floor is moving," Thor growls quietly. "What has happened?"

Silence for a second longer, and then Clint starts to laugh. Slowly at first, and then he's howling. Loki feels Thor tense against him, and then "AGENT BARTON, I FAIL TO SEE THE AMUSEMENT IN THIS!"

Loki drags his head up and glares as best he can at Clint's blurry face. "You did this?"

Clint is wheezing with laughter. "No, I didn't, which is too bad. Come on, dudes. Are you serious? You seriously don't know what's wrong with Loki. He's drunk, guys. _Drunk._ And I didn't even think gods could get drunk! That's _amazing." _He's off laughing again.

Tony starts to chuckle a second later. "Oh wow. Ohhhh wow."

"What word is this? 'Drunk'? What does it mean?" Thor is still angry.

"Come on dude, really? You don't even know what 'drunk' means? When you drink too much alcohol?" Clint looks disbelieving.

Loki stares up at his brother in shock. "But..."

Thor blinks silently. "That is not the word we use for this condition. I have heard of it, but never seen it. We cannot get – as you say, 'drunk'." He looks down at Loki, brow furrowed. "At least not before."

"Maybe – maybe cause he doesn't have any magic left..." Clint wipes his eyes. "Oh man, that's just _perfect." _

Loki's eyes are getting hot. His head is spinning, his chest feels strangely tight, and he _hates _feeling out of control. He clings to Thor desperately, embarrassment staining his cheeks red. He has nothing to say.

"Just... sit down." Tony looks like he's trying very hard not to start laughing again. "It'll pass, Loki. But man, you were really putting them away. If I'd known... I just assumed you were a damn good drinker. Oh man."

"Come, brother." Thor leads him to the couch and they sit. "Calm yourself."

Loki wants to cry. _Never again will I drink that foul stuff. Never! _He leans his wobbly head on Thor's shoulder and curls up next to his brother. _Only commoners drink too much and become fools. Not gods. _He's so embarrassed, he can't look at anyone. He feels very small.

The room is oddly silent again, although he can still hear Clint chuckling quietly. "I'll just... start the movie again." There's a smile in Tony's voice, Loki hears it.

Thor rubs Loki's back with one hand, sensing his brother's quickly dropping spirits, and Loki is grateful for the comfort. He's suddenly very tired. Where his head felt too light before, it now feels a thousand pounds, and he can't keep his eyes open. Thor is is solid and comforting and warm, and Loki drifts off.

X

_Pain. _

It's the first thing he knows. He shifts slightly. There's something soft under his head – a pillow. He cracks open one eye, recognizes the ceiling of his room. _How did I get here? _The last thing he remembers is wobbling around in the living room. _Get up Loki. _

Pain shoots up behind his eyes and he whimpers, curling in on himself.

"Brother?" Thor's voice.

Loki squints timidly at him, wary of his aching eyes. Thor stands in the doorway, concern evident. "How do you feel, brother?"

"Like you just hit me in the head with Mjolnir," Loki whispers. "What happened?"

Thor crosses to the bed and sits on the edge heavily. "You fell asleep last night while we were watching Stark's film. I carried you in here." He shrugs. "The others warned me you may be experiencing pain today. Apparently it is normal."

"_What _is normal?" Loki hisses, glaring at his big brother. "_None _of this is even _close _to normal, Thor! Never have I experienced so much pain in such a short time in my life. It is all thanks to your friends! First that green beast nearly breaks every bone in my body, then they cook me, and now they have pickled me! I have had enough! I will not put up with them any longer!" Tears spring into his eyes against his will.

"Brother! Do not look so sad." Thor is smiling, but he pulls Loki against his chest, wrapping him firmly in strong arms. "All of this is new to you now, but you will grow used to it. Stark and the others meant you no harm. They were simply trying to include you in the celebration."

"Celebration of what?" Loki sniffs, his aching head on Thor's shoulder. "Celebration of how amusing and easy it is to cause me pain?"

Thor chuckles. "I actually do not know. They seem to celebrate often, these humans. I do not complain, it is great fun. Before you became – drunk – did you not enjoy the drinks?"

Loki glares at Thor's neck. "Yes."

"Exactly. Now come, brother, Agent Barton has told me he has something for you which may help. A strange sort of capsule, called perhaps Add Ville? I am slightly confused by his description. But he says it will take away your pain!"

Loki rolls his eyes. "Of course, there is no one I would rather accept a strange capsule from than Agent Barton."

Thor chuckles. "You know I will not let him do anything to you, brother."

"Of course not, brother. You have done such a good job of protecting me so far," Loki grouches, but he doesn't really mean it. Because in the end, although he is in pain, he is not dead, and he is surrounded by people who do want him dead, and therefore maybe Thor is doing an alright job of keeping him safe after all.

X

**Please leave a review and let me know what you thought! ****Reviews make me very happy and encourage me to write more and faster - so please review! :)  
**

**Thank you for reading!  
**


	3. Chapter 3

**Big thanks again to everyone who has reviewed so far! I'm beyond happy that you're all liking it so much. And you all leave the most amazing reviews! Each one puts a huge grin on my face! Thank you!**

**Man, this chapter went through so many rewrites it isn't even funny. But I _finally _managed to squish it and shape it into something readable, and I'm _finally _happy with it. So I hope you all like it as well. :)  
**

**WARNING: Some language!  
**

**X  
**

His bed is so deliciously comfortable. _Even more comfortable, _he can't help thinking, _than the one at home. _A strange thought, because he thought that his bed at home was the most amazing bed to have ever existed, but this, this one is beyond anything.

Or perhaps it's just because he slept so very well last night – a heavy, dreamless sleep, completely uninterrupted. He'd woken slowly to the sun peeking around the blinds, setting the small room aglow with golden highlights.

_And the beauty of the thing is, I do not have to get up. I can lay here all day if I want to. And maybe I will do just that. _

He's so very comfortable, he hasn't moved an inch since waking up. He closes his eyes again, preparing to slip back into blissful rest.

"BROTHER!"

Loki jumps about a mile, eyes flying open. The familiar voice is followed by a loud pounding on the door.

"Brother, are you awake? Come, I have plans for today!"

Loki glares at the ceiling for a long moment. "Thor, I am still sleeping!"

Thor's chuckle almost vibrates the floor. "Brother, how you love to jest. Come, get up. Today is a good day for adventures."

Loki grits his teeth, then leaps out of the bed, opens the door a crack, and glares at Thor through it.

"Today was a good day for sleeping. Today was a good day for resting, and thinking of nothing but how comfortable my bed was. Today was a good day for not once getting out of that bed. Now, today is good for absolutely nothing, thanks to you, brother. I hope you are pleased with how idiotic you can be."

Thor's smile is blinding. "Loki, you do amuse me. Why should you want to waste this beautiful day laying in bed? There is a vast world out there to be explored."

"There is a vast brain in your head which you do not use," Loki hisses, blue eyes narrowed. "I am going back to bed now. If you disturb me again, I cannot be held responsible for my actions."

He slams the door in Thor's grinning face, then collapses back onto his bed, muttering.

After a few moments of tossing and turning, trying to find the same comfy spot, he is forced to admit it. The bed is no longer comfortable. He growls into his pillow.

Hands clenched into fists, Loki stomps back to the door and opens it.

Thor is still outside, leaning casually on the door frame, as Loki knew he would be. He glares with all his might.

"I detest you, brother."

Thor's teeth shine brightly. "We both know that is not true. Come, friend Stark is making us breakfast."

X

Loki sulks at the table, playing with his food, as Thor drinks his orange juice with gusto. He slams his glass down.

"This is delicious! I wish to have more."

"The carton's in the fridge, Mr. Blonde. Help yourself. And don't break that glass. Or chip that counter." Tony barely looks up, preoccupied with the TV.

Loki glares at his brother as Thor strides back toward him, carton in hand and ridiculous smile on face.

"Are you going to explain to me now why you dragged me so cruelly from my much-needed sleep?" Loki leans back, running pale fingers through jet black hair.

Thor makes him wait until he finishes his glass, and then he smiles widely. "Today, brother, you and I are going to go out and explore this amazing city."

Loki blinks at him. "You cannot be serious."

"I am, Loki! You have been here on Earth for approximately sixteen days now, and you have not left this building. Beyond that, _I _have not done much exploring either. It will be great fun with the two of us."

"You and I obviously have very different ideas of what is fun," Loki says quietly, rolling his eyes.

"No, I think it's a good idea." Tony still hasn't taken his eyes off the TV, and he's chewing cereal as he speaks. "You guys need to get out more. Baby Bro, you're even losing your tan."

Loki glares at him forcefully. "Which you all should be glad of. If my skin had stayed that atrocious colour you all would have become familiar with my wrath."

"Been there, done that. I'm shaking in my boots." Tony flicks a Fruit Loop at him, and Loki gapes at him.

"You are detestable and ignorant."

"And you are a pain in the ass. And you're starting to look like a fish."

"Your attempts at insults are deplorable, as I do not understand most of them."

Tony finally drags his eyes away from the TV. "Okay, honestly? Get out of my tower. Both of you. Just disappear for one day. If I have to see you two for one more second I'm gonna implode. Just go for a walk or something. Beat it."

Loki looks to Thor. "You see how he treats us like vermin, Thor? You call him a friend?"

"I haven't killed your ass yet, have I? Therefore I think you can count me as a friend." Tony points his spoon at Loki. "You need to be a little more grateful, Prancer. Those eyes'll only get you so far before your bad attitude ruins any hope of anyone ever liking you."

"I hate you," Loki spits, glaring with all his might.

"_I hate you," _Tony mocks in a high voice. "What are you, five? Thor, would you please just get your baby brother out of my sight for like two hours? He's killing me, he really is."

"Not yet I haven't," Loki mutters.

Thor claps a hand on his shoulder, and Loki jumps and drops his glass.

Thor looks vastly amused. "Already today is entertaining. Stark is truly a worthy match for your wit, Loki. Now go, brother, dress appropriately for our adventures. We will leave in ten minutes."

Loki shoots one last furious glance at Tony and leaves.

X

"That's dressing appropriately for your 'adventures'?" Tony isn't even bothering to hide his laughter.

Loki adjusts his armor and doesn't answer.

Thor, beside him, smiles gently. "Friend Stark, we have absolutely no idea what form of adventure we will encounter today, and it is always best to be prepared."

He, too, is wearing his armor, but neither of them wear their cloaks.

"I have some idea of the kind of adventure you're gonna encounter today. It's probably going to involve a lot of pointing and laughing. But please – don't listen to me. Go on kids. Enjoy."

"What did he mean, do you think, by pointing and laughing?" Thor wonders out loud as they ride the elevator down to ground level.

"I would listen to nothing that childish human says." Loki lifts his chin. "He rambles incessantly, and knows little."

X

Together they stride down the sidewalk away from Stark Tower. Loki has to admit, it's nice to be out in the open air again instead of in that detestable tower. And he does feel at home walking beside his brother. Together, they are nothing to be scoffed at. No one will dare approach these two princes, these two gods.

"You guys going to a party?" A young man approaching them from the opposite direction smiles brightly.

Thor brightens. "Is there a party nearby, human?"

The man shrugs. "You'd know better than me. What kind of party is it, some kind of costume party?" He taps the armor on Thor's chest.

"I assure you, my brother and I are not attending any parties today, regrettably." Thor smiles down at Loki, who is glaring at the man with undisguised disdain, and they move on.

X

Loki becomes aware quite quickly that everyone is staring at them. Even people inside of buildings are turning to look as they walk by.

"Why do these humans stare? Do they not realize who they are staring at?" Loki crosses his arms. "A display of power right now would be appropriate. Regrettably, I do not have that capability. Thor. Do something."

He turns to his brother, but Thor is gone.

For a moment he panics, very aware of the huge buildings and thousands of people all around him, and of how very small he is in the midst of it all.

_Collect yourself, Loki. Thor would not leave you here. _

He turns, and sure enough, Thor is only about twenty feet away, in front of a gigantic tower, gazing in awe. Loki joins him. "I suppose it is rather impressive, for something the humans made," Loki concedes.

"What?" Thor glances at him. "Oh, the tower. I was not looking at that, brother. I already stood on top of that some weeks ago." He points. "That – that is what I am so in awe of."

There's a large glass box in front of them, slightly taller than them both, and inside are brightly coloured packages, all in rows.

"What is it?" Loki asks, interested in spite of himself.

"That, Loki, is something the humans call 'candy'." Thor is grinning widely. "I shared some with friend Stark a few days ago. I do recommend it, brother! It was delicious. I believe they were called 'Skittles'. Like tiny coloured pieces of joy, all different flavours." He points at the glass box. "And here they are – an entire box of them, out in the streets, for anyone to help themselves! Nowhere in Asgard would you find a wonder like this. Come, brother, we shall have 'Skittles'."

They march up to the box, and Thor presses the 'Skittles' button on the side. They wait expectantly, but the box stays silent and unmoving.

Loki glances at his brother, whose excited smile is starting to fade.

"How odd." He presses the button again as Loki watches quietly. Still nothing. Thor's face is starting to darken. "If this is some sort of cruel trick, I remain unamused."

Loki recognizes the warning signs of his brother's temper rising, and moves forward to inspect the box. Small red words flash by on a tiny screen above the buttons.

"It reads here, 'Insert two dollars'." Loki looks to his brother. "What are 'dollars'?"

Thor's face clears abruptly, and he gives a great shout of laughter that makes everyone nearby turn and stare. "Of course! How foolish of me, brother. Friend Stark did warn me."

He reaches into his pocket and produces a handful of small, round pieces of metal. "These are dollars, brother! Apparently here on Earth, you must use them to pay for things." He looks slightly disappointed. "I did think the Skittles were free, however, simply sitting here in this clear box. Energy for passing travelers, if you will. No matter. We shall have them anyway."

Thor inserts a couple of coins into the slot, and then presses the Skittles button again. They lean down, watching intently as the Skittles inside start to move forward. Taking a quick scan of the box, Loki assumes that the package will fall down to the bottom, and they can reach it through the slot. Quite smart, really.

Except the Skittles don't fall down. They hover on the edge, and then stop moving.

Loki and Thor continue to stare at them.

"It takes a while," Loki comments. Thor doesn't answer. He looks troubled.

A few minutes later, the Skittles have still not moved.

Loki shoots his brother a sideways glance. "I do believe they are not coming out."

Thor's jaw is clenched, his eyes narrowed. "They must! This box took my dollars!"

"No. It took Stark's dollars." Loki smirks. "Not much of a loss, really."

"Loki! You miss the point." Thor growls under his breath. "This box took my dollars, and I received nothing in return! I will not stand for such atrocious sportsmanship!" He punches the side of the box viciously, and it simply rocks back and forth a little.

Loki sighs. "Always brute force, brother! Allow me."

He kneels in front of the box, and gingerly pushes his hand into the slot at the bottom. He feels somewhat ridiculous doing this, but to be quite honest, Thor's depiction of these 'Skittles' has peaked his curiosity, and he really does want to try them. Unfortunately, his arm is not long enough to reach the Skittles, or any other thing in the box. Loki gets the sneaking feeling the box has been designed so that he cannot reach. _Bastards. _

A voice behind them makes him jump, and he starts to whip his hand out, only to have the flap close on him when he is halfway there, catching his hand inside. He gasps in pain.

"Vending machine eat your money? That sucks." A young man walking by shakes his head and shrugs.

Thor stares after him, then back at his brother, who is holding his hand up shakily. "Brother, you are bleeding!" He grabs Loki's hand, which has a nasty cut just below his wrist. "How did this happen?"

Loki stares wide eyed at his brother, then at the silent box next to him. "It bit me, Thor!"

Thor's eyes narrow dangerously. "That young human walking by said it ate my money. Now it has attacked you, which I will not stand for. I am mistaken, brother, this is no simple candy box. This is some sort of creature, trying to tempt us into its jaws. The Skittles are simply a ruse! This creature will feel my wrath, as so many others have in the past!"

With a roar of rage, he lifts the box and wings it out into the street, as easy as if he were throwing Mjolnir. It crashes to the ground some twenty feet away, pieces flying in all directions. Cars swerve madly to avoid it, and people all around begin screaming in shock. Thor looks pleased.

"The creature does not move. I believe I have effectively killed it." He turns to Loki. "Are you alright, brother?"

Loki glares at the trashed mess out in the street and nods. "Every day I am more and more unimpressed by Earth."

"Um, can I ask what you two idiots are doing?"

They turn to see Agent Barton coming toward them, holding a hot dog and a couple of bags.

Loki sighs and rolls his eyes skyward.

"Ah, friend Clint! I have just dispatched a monster which attacked my brother." Thor grins proudly, wrapping an arm around Loki's shoulders.

Clint looks back and forth warily. "What monster?" His eyes fall on the vending machine. "Oh crap. Oh crap. Yeah, okay, we need to get out of here right now."

As if on cue, sirens start up somewhere nearby.

"Okay, walk. _Fast." _Clint shoves Loki in the back, and Loki glowers at him.

"I warn you, do not ever touch me again in that manner."

"Whatever. Just go!"

They make it around the corner, Clint hastily eating his hot dog. "Man, a guy can't even eat lunch around here without having to look out for you fools. Good thing we're so close to Stark Tower. Hey, you're bleeding," he says in an off-hand way to Loki, who pulls down his sleeve and doesn't reply.

"How'd that happen?" Clint looks at Thor.

"I told you, the monster attacked my brother."

"The monster? Oh the vending machine? Damn. That's not good."

The brothers both stare at him. "What do you mean, friend Clint?" Thor asks.

"Those vending machine monsters, their bite is really, really poisonous. Like I'm talking deadly. If you still had your powers, you'd probably be okay... but now... you probably don't have much time left." Clint shakes his head seriously. "Dude, I know you and I don't get along but... I wouldn't wish that death on my worst enemy, which you pretty much are."

Loki's heart begins to pound, fingers of fear clutching at his heart. "Thor?" He looks back desperately at his brother for reassurance.

Thor's eyes are wide. "Do you feel the poison, brother?"

"I feel nothing!" Loki pulls back his sleeve, staring in horror at the thin wound.

"Could it be numb?" Thor takes his brother's wrist gently. "It shows no signs of poison!"

Clint shrugs. "It never does. It's just... you feel fine one minute, and the next..." He trails off ominously. "I've known a few guys that've gone like that."

Loki begins to tremble, fear blowing his blue eyes wide. "But..."

Thor grabs his arm, pulling him forward. "Hurry, Loki! There must still be time!"

They all run for the tower, bursting into the elevator breathlessly.

X

When they step out on the tenth floor, Tony looks up in surprise. "Back so soon? I didn't realize New York City had got so small."

"Loki was attacked. We need help right now!" Thor shouts.

Loki can barely move he's so scared. he just stands behind Thor, staring in shock at his hand. _Poisoned. Dying. _

"Whatttt?" Tony hops off the bar stool he was sitting on. "Attacked by what, may I ask? He looks fine to me."

"A creature, masquerading as a candy box," Thor says earnestly, pulling Loki close to him like a protective bear. "According to Agent Barton, it is a highly poisonous creature and my brother has little time!"

Loki doesn't even bother pushing Thor away, instead he huddles against his brother, shaking. Even his teeth are chattering.

"It was a vending machine," Clint says, breathing heavily. He nods meaningfully in Tony's direction.

Tony's mouth twitches, and he avoids Clint's eyes. "Well Bruce is back, so you're in luck. Go see him, he's in the lab."

X

Bruce is leaning over a microscope, and he eyes them warily as they hurry in. "What are you two doing down here?"

Loki falls back a bit behind Thor, tugging out of his brother's grasp, letting him lead the way. Truth is, he's still a bit scared of Bruce after that whole incident with 'The Other Guy'. He generally tries to avoid Bruce at all costs. So it feels very wrong to be approaching him asking for help, no matter how scared he is.

Bruce looks vaguely amused at seeing the God of Mischief hiding behind his brother, but he doesn't comment.

"My brother was attacked by a strange – what did they call it, Loki? Vending machine? A vile creature, and highly poisonous, as I'm sure you are aware." Thor tugs Loki forward.

"My brother was wounded in the attack," Thor continues, sounding as if he is recounting a terrible, epic battle. "Please, Doctor Banner, we need your help! I do not know how much longer he has."

Bruce's mouth twitches just like Tony's. "Attacked, huh? That's too bad." He looks mildly interested. "Okay. Hop up on the table." He pats the table next to him, and Loki eyes him warily.

"Can I not stand?"

"I prefer to have you sitting. You'll move less."

"Sit, brother! Now is no time for arguing!" Thor moves him bodily towards the table, and Loki shoots him a look half frustrated and half fearful. But he gets up on the table, and Thor stays next to him with an arm around his shoulders, sensing his brother's discomfort. Loki is grateful for it.

Bruce is smiling at him. "So what happened? Show me."

Loki glances at his brother, who gives him a reassuring nod, and pulls up his sleeve with shaking fingers.

Bruce takes his hand carefully. "This is what happened in the... attack?" He feels Loki's hand trembling, and his face softens a little.

Thor nods gravely, a hint of tears shining in his eyes. "Please, I beg you, do all you can."

Bruce nods gravely, too, glancing at Loki's massive blue eyes once before reaching for a small bottle of clear liquid next to the table. "This might sting." He pours a bit of it onto a cotton ball and dabs the cut on Loki's hand, holding him still when he jerks slightly.

"There. All done." He lets go and turns away.

"What?" Loki stares after him. "That is all?"

"That's all." Bruce sounds like he's hiding a smile. "You'll be fine. I promise."

"There is no drawing out of the poison? How will it leave my brother's body?" Thor is still hugging him close as though expecting him to vanish any second, and Loki still lets him.

Bruce smiles gently. "Um. I guess now is when you should find out – there is no poison, never was. Clint was just kidding with you. A vending machine is not a monster, guys. It's just that – a machine. For dispensing food." He shrugs, still smiling. "You guys go and relax. You look terrible." He goes back to his microscope.

Loki sits there against Thor, shivers still coursing through his body, and then "I loathe Agent Barton!" He shoves Thor away in his anger, sliding off the table and glaring at the elevator viciously.

"I think the feeling is mutual," Thor says, slightly sadly. "Let's go, brother. Perhaps we can watch a movie instead."

"No, I think I will spend the rest of the day _in my room_," Loki snaps, pulling his elbow from his brother's grasp. "You see, if you had not nearly broken down my door this morning, and dragged me out into that hateful city, none of this would have happened. Another of your ill-advised plans, brother."

He knows it's unfair to blame Thor, but he needs someone to blame, and Clint is not nearby. Plus, he is just the slightest bit scared of Clint.

He strides ahead, and Thor follows him, sighing. "Brother, do not take this out on me. Agent Barton dislikes you, for good reason. It was just a bit of fun, as you would say. Although it was not very fun, really." He stops, considering his own words, then goes on. "I wanted to spend this day with you. I still do. I must go back to Asgard tomorrow. Will you not reconsider?"

Loki slows a little, turning to face his brother.

"Thor, you may disregard my words at this moment, for I am beyond angry and do not mean what I say to you. But you can tell Agent _Barton..." _he hisses the name like a curse word – "... that he is a despicable excuse for a man and I wish nothing but ill luck on him!"

He marches to his room, opens the door, and turns to face Thor. "I am no longer in the mood to spend this day with _anyone,_ Thor. It would be in your best interests to leave me alone at this time."

"Brother, I know you were scared..."

"Do shut up, Thor! You know nothing." Loki slams the door behind him, furious at Thor's comment, because yes, he really had been scared. "I will never venture out into that city again!" He yells through the door, and, after discarding his armor, flops onto his bed like a ragdoll.

"Curse this planet. And Agent Barton."

X

**I just want to say, I do not hate Agent Barton, I really don't! I love Jeremy Renner, and I think Hawkeye is awesome! But I do think he'd harbor an awful lot of bad feelings toward Loki after the events of the movie and that he'd get a kick out of scaring him like this, as mean as it is. Just wanted to get that out of the way though in case anyone thinks I'm hating on Clint.**

**I hope you liked it! Please leave me a review and let me know what you thought. :)  
**


	4. Chapter 4

**Sooo, first things first! I want to apologize for the longer than normal wait on this one. I have been suffering from a severe case of writer's block. But this one finally made it, don't ask how. **

**Secondly, I want to give huge thanks again to everyone who has reviewed. You are all so awesome! Also, to the people who have reviewed anonymously, leaving me glowing reviews that made me grin foolishly just like Thor, endless THANK YOUs!  
**

**Finally, this chapter is shorter than usual, because I really am having a hard time writing right now for some reason. I just can't think of anything good/funny enough to write about Loki and Thor experiencing. So I'd like to invite you guys to give me suggestions for chapters you'd like to read. I can't promise I'll get to all of them, or that they'll be written quickly, but otherwise this will probably be the last chapter. (I know, I know! There's so many things in the world they would be confused by! But can I come up with any more? No! I don't know why! I think I need to see The Avengers again.) So feel free to suggest something if you'd like. Sometimes all it takes is a suggestion and I'm off and away writing an endless chapter. So. **

**On to the fourth chapter.  
**

**X  
**

"Brother..."

"No!"

Thor sighs, blond hair blowing gently in the breeze, elbows resting on his knees, hands clasped. "Why not?"

Loki shoots him a chilling glare, one hand propping up his head, the other clutching the arm of the chair in a death grip.

"Why not? Are you really so obtuse, brother? That atrocious machine your _friends_ forced me to ride has made my head ache and my stomach churn. I will never go near it again!" He looks away to escape his brother's sympathetic blue eyes.

"Loki, they did not force you!" Thor exclaims, his broad face earnest. "They thought you would enjoy it! Did you not find it like the Bifrost?"

"It was about as like to the Bifrost as a fool is to a god," Loki snaps, leaning forward furiously. "Well in your case, actually..."

Thor gives him a long look that doesn't hold much amusement. "Brother, come now. How was it different from the Bifrost? They are both fast, they are both..."

"'_They are both fast, they are both speedy, they are both so much fun,'"_ Loki mocks viciously, dropping his voice a few keys and managing a passable Thor impression. "Really, brother? Here is the main reason for them being nothing alike – I do not think the Bifrost has ever made me feel as though I were about to empty all the contents of my stomach from today and many past days onto the ground!"

He kicks the side of Thor's chair, which is childish, and then says in a smaller voice, "Also, it has never made my head ache as though Mjolnir is bouncing around inside."

Thor's eyes soften, and Loki immediately senses the protective big brother coming. "You can stop right now Thor. I am in no need of your pity."

He looks up at the umbrella that covers the two of them, feeling irritated by the bright stripes all over it. "There is so much _brightness _here."

Thor relaxes a little, leaning back in his chair. "It is quite magnificent."

Loki gives a rather un-princely snort. "Only an idiot would say such a thing."

"Heyyyyyy! How come no one invited us to the party?"

Tony is heading toward them, followed closely by Steve, Bruce, and Clint. They're all carrying towels, and wearing huge grins, especially Steve, who is wearing American flag swim shorts.

Loki glowers at them from under his hand while Thor grins like a fool.

"Friends! How glad I am to see all of you!"

Loki can't help rolling his eyes. It's not as if they're seeing each other after a year of absence, or something, the other Avengers had literally just left to go change their clothes. But honestly, he has long ago given up his brother for lost. Mostly, anyway.

Abruptly, something hits him in the back of the head, and he whirls in anger to see Clint, brandishing his towel and smiling toothily.

"What's the matter?"

"Please, Agent Barton, do that again and we will see what happens." Loki flexes his fingers menacingly, and Tony makes a face.

"Could we have peace for like, one second? You guys are like an old married couple, I swear. Let's go on these slides. Baby Bro, you're coming right?"

Loki is so disgusted by Tony's comment he can't even think of anything to say, but unfortunately for him, Thor is more than ready to step in.

"Of course he is! Come, brother, we will go change our garments now into something appropriate for swimming and we will meet these fine gentlemen back here. Let us go." Thor grips his arm and quite literally lifts him up, Loki jerks his arm away furiously as they walk.

"Why in the name of Asgard did you say that, you fool? You know I do not wish to participate in this idiocy. Just look at this place!"

Giant plastic tubes – slides, Tony called them - in various colours twist into pools all around them, people are shooting out the ends into the water. It's quite one of the weirdest places the brothers have ever set eyes upon, and far too strange and colourful for Loki's liking. He doesn't trust that much colour.

Thor, unlike Loki, is bright-eyed and intrigued. "Brother, I wish to try these so called 'Water Slides', and I would like you to try them with me! It will of course be amusing, this fantastic place is called an 'Amusement Park'!" Thor chuckles heartily.

Loki gives him a long, disgusted look. "You concern me, Thor, how easily you go along with these oaf's plans. Did you not learn from that hideous ride we just got off?"

"I merely learned that there is enjoyment here on Earth that I have never experienced in Asgard! The – what is it called? – 'Roller Coaster' was a thing of beauty! And rather like riding the Bifrost." Thor grins.

"There was nothing 'coasting' about that ride whatsoever," Loki snaps irritably. "More like 'launching'. And it was detestable. One day you will regret going along with all of these plans."

"And on that day, I am sure you will not let me forget you warned me," Thor replies wearily. "But until that day, might we enjoy ourselves a little, brother?"

Loki stops right outside the 'Change Rooms' and advances on his brother.

"_This_ is not my idea of fun, Thor! You forget that your so-called 'friends' have never given me any reason to trust them whatsoever! Nevertheless, again and again I am dragged into their vindictive schemes by _you_, who are supposed to be my brother and _protector _against such things! Also, do you forget so easily that I detest water?" He whirls away toward the building without looking back.

X

They come back out minutes later, Thor wearing a pair of bright red swimming shorts and smiling blindingly at several women, who are gaping appreciatively.

Loki wears a pair of dark green shorts, and he crosses his arms and glares at the woman who is smiling at him.

"That girl was totally checking you out." Tony sidles up, eyebrows raised. "What're you looking like you just ate a lemon for?"

"Mortals are loathsome creatures." Loki takes a deep breath. "Also, I do not understand this term, 'checking out'."

"Ummm, okay, I'll explain that later." Tony pats him on the arm, ignoring the disgusted look he gets in return.

"I must tell you all, my brother does not appreciate water," Thor says clearly, one arm wrapped securely around Loki's shoulders as though introducing him to a new group of friends. "He has never liked it, he cannot swim that well, it has been this way since he were a child."

Loki gapes at him, furious at the betrayal. "Thank you, Thor." His voice drips with sarcasm. "I longed for everyone to know that fact."

"You don't have to swim," Bruce says quickly, sensing the tension between the two brothers, "The only water you'll be in is about up to your waist."

"Yeah. Don't worry. Your shoulders probably won't even go under, let alone your head." Tony waves his hand. "Let's head for The Dead Zone. Total blackness. My favourite."

"Naw," Bruce speaks up suddenly. "I think we should do Waterfalls. We wanna get wet right? That one's the best for it. Plus we can all ride it at the same time."

"Fiiiiine," Tony sighs, but he whips his towel at Bruce's head.

Steve is almost bouncing he's so excited.

"Of course, there was stuff like this in 1942. But it wasn't anywhere near this cool looking! And I loved the ones back then too!"

Loki rolls his eyes._ How pathetic. _

"There's Waterfalls," Clint points at a gigantic purple slide some distance away. "Y'all ready for this?" He grins maniacally, and Loki gives him a withering look.

"It shocks me how moronic you allow yourself to be in front of others, Agent Barton."

"Let's go line up," Bruce suggests, and he leads the way.

X

"Is this a jest?" Thor asks loudly, and people all around turn to stare at him. "Why do we wait?"

"Because we have to wait our turn," Steve says calmly, his blond hair is carefully combed to the side and his face is calm and unbothered.

Loki feels irritation. He eyes the long line of people, going right up a set of stairs in front of them and disappearing somewhere into the tower overhead.

"Ridiculous. How pointless. You were right, Thor, humans do many inane things."

"We are Asgardian princes," Thor says, looking disgruntled for the first time all day. He's almost pouting. "We should not have to wait. Back home, at meal times, we ate first and waited for no one. The line for the large orange 'roller coaster' was nowhere near as long. Perhaps, friend Stark, if you explained to the handlers of this ride who they have in their park..."

"Okay, fancy pants, hold it." Tony points at him. "You guys are nobody here, just saying. These people have no clue what Asgard is, or whatever. You'll just look like a couple of jerks trying to jump the line." He pauses. "Which yeah, is what you would be. Just be patient, if that's not too much to ask."

"It is definitely too much to ask of my brother," Loki snickers, and Thor frowns at him.

X

Loki yawns. Although they are now on the steps, the line seems to be creeping so slowly it might as well be not moving.

Thor sighs, leaning heavily on the railing. "I still say, we should explain..."

Tony huffs. "Shut up, Mr. Blonde. You're making this wait seem even longer."

X

"You must be jesting." Loki can't keep the words from coming out. They have finally reached the top of the stairs, and in front of them is the gaping mouth of Waterfalls, deep purple and with a wall of water falling right over the entrance. "I refuse to go through that."

"Why? It's awesome, I swear! Don't be such a baby." Tony nearly leaps forward when it's their turn, not noticing the look of terror Loki shoots his brother.

Thor himself doesn't look that confident anymore, but he bravely hitches on a smile and steps forward, tugging Loki with him.

"We can all ride in one inner tube," Bruce calls, already sitting inside the large, circular chunk of rubber. "Come on!"

Steve jumps right on in, grinning hugely, and is closely followed by Clint, and then Tony, who lounges back on the inner tube as though he were on a lawn chair.

The young man running the ride stares at Loki and Thor blankly. "Are you guys gonna go or not?" He's holding the inner tube in place with one hand and looks bored out of his mind.

"Yes, we are, good human!" Thor puts a foot in the inner tube, Loki's foot remains firmly on the concrete.

"No, Thor, I refuse."

"Loki! Come on! It will be fun, I am sure of it!" Thor smiles reassuringly.

"You are sure of it? Like you were sure these petulant humans would never harm me? Or like you were sure you would one day be King of Asgard?" Loki crosses his arms and smiles triumphantly.

"LOKI, YOU GO TOO FAR!" Thor roars.

People are gaping at the scene in front of them, several women scream at Thor's raised voice.

Noticing the stares, Thor swallows and lowers his voice, forcing a smile. "Nevertheless, I forgive you, brother. You do love to jest. Now get in this boat before I have to carry you in."

"Come on, ya coward!" Clint slaps the side of the inner tube and Loki shoots him a frigid glare.

"Do shut up, you detestable man!"

"Uh, if you aren't going to ride, you're gonna have to go back down the stairs." The young man sighs heavily. "You're holding up the line, buddy."

Loki leans close to him, his eyes an icy blue. "Never call me that again, or I will rip your heart out and throw it down that tunnel. Please understand I am serious. You do not know who you speak to."

Thor appears at his side quite suddenly, a wide grin plastered on his face. "My brother is having a bad day, forgive him, he did not mean that threat... as much as it may have seemed he did."

Loki glares at him, and Thor takes the opportunity to drag him into the inner tube, where Clint grabs his arm too and drags him down.

"Get your filthy hands off me!" Loki wails, shoving Clint away so hard he crashes into Bruce, who looks unfazed.

"Here we go," the young man intones blandly, and shoves the inner tube toward the water.

Loki is not the only one to yelp in shock when the freezing water hits them, but he is the only one who ends up pressed against Thor like a frightened animal. Thor is chuckling heartily, blond hair streaming water in his eyes, and he pats Loki's back reassuringly. "That was not so bad, brother, was it?"

The inner tube abruptly drops – Thor shouts – and picks up speed. Tony whoops, his voice echoing in the tunnel. "YEAHHHHHH this is the LIFE!"

Loki can only shudder in horror as the inner tube takes a sharp turn, riding the sides of the tunnel, and then – _smack_ – right under another wall of water. Steve is laughing so hard he's clutching his stomach, and even Bruce is chuckling gently.

"Loki! Is this not fun?" Thor, no longer afraid, looks rather a lot like a wet lion. "Amazing, friends! Just amazing!"

Loki cannot find angry enough words to express his feelings, so he stays silent, glowering at Tony's laughing face through the water in his eyes.

And then – light at the end of the tunnel – and as they reach the bottom, Clint stands up halfway and then drops down again quickly and the whole inner tube is suddenly overturned, throwing each and every one of them into the drink with an almighty splash.

X

"Damn, it was just some fun," Clint calls as they step out of the pool, but Loki doesn't care. He strides away blindly, ignoring Thor's heavy footsteps behind him.

"Brother, stop! Loki!" Thor grabs his arm, and Loki whirls around, blue eyes flaming.

"What do you want now, Thor? To tell me to join you on some other ill-advised, 'fun' ride? Because I tell you I will _not!" _

He almost wants to stomp his foot he's so mad, but he hasn't done that since he was just a child, and now is not the time to regress to childish ways, so he shoves Thor instead.

"You know I loathe swimming," he hisses. "You even told your detestable friends and still! Look what they did!"

"You're just mad cause your brother had to save you from drowning," Clint calls, his voice carrying annoyingly across the concrete. "And everybody saw you crying and everything."

Loki starts to move toward Clint furiously, but to his surprise Thor gets there first.

"HOLD YOUR TONGUE, AGENT BARTON!" His gigantic hand is wrapped around Clint's throat, not enough to choke, but enough to frighten, and Loki is pleased to see Clint does look the tiniest bit scared.

"I TOLD YOU MY BROTHER COULD NOT SWIM WELL AND STILL YOU PLAY YOUR FOOLISH GAMES, AND THEN MOCK HIM? THIS I CANNOT TAKE LIGHTLY!"

"Okay, okay! Let's calm down!" Tony looks rather like a bravely mewing kitten next to an infuriated lion, but nevertheless he manages to distract the demi-god. "I know that was stupid – really, really stupid – but Loki's fine, isn't he? So let's not kill Clint..." He pries at Thor's fingers, which do not budge one centimeter, "...and move on. Clint, uh, apologize."

"Sorry," Clint says, rolling his eyes dramatically.

"APOLOGIZE TO MY BROTHER, NOT TO ME!" Thor roars, and Clint jumps.

"Okay, okay! Jeez! Sorry, Loki. Sorry I overturned the inner tube on purpose when I know you can't swim. There, are we done? Crap."

"I can too swim!" Loki spits angrily. "I just cannot swim _well._ And I do not accept your apology, you imbecile." He crosses his arms, eyes shooting daggers.

"You look exactly like a wet cat, you know that?" Tony pats his shoulder as he walks by, Loki twitches irritably. "Let's go! Now we're doing The Dead Zone."

Thor finally lets go of Clint's neck and walks toward Loki. "No, friend Stark, I think my brother and I will go back to the tower. It has been a long day." He claps a hand on Loki's shoulder, Loki stares at him openly.

"Dude are you serious? It's not even lunch time!" Tony points at the black slide not too far away, his eyebrows comically high. "The Dead Zone! _The Dead Zone!_ Don't you want to go?"

Thor shakes his head firmly. "No, friend Stark. I have had enough of this Amusement Park, as amusing as it is. You go. My brother and I will see you tonight."

But Loki knows he didn't imagine the longing in Thor's eyes as he looks at The Dead Zone, and he feels a sudden surge of gratitude towards his brother.

"Let us go, Loki." Thor heads back toward the change rooms, and Loki follows him quickly.

"I thank you, brother." The words are hard to get out, but he does mean them.

Thor smiles in a brotherly fashion. "Do not mention it, Loki. Perhaps we will go to the tower and drink all of friend Stark's alcohol. Or we could dismantle friend Clint's room!" He chuckles loudly.

Loki's eyes narrow. "For once in your life brother, I believe you have had a good plan."

X

**So - good? Bad? Ugly? **

**Please review and let me know :)  
**

**Thanks for reading!  
**


	5. Chapter 5

**First of all, I want to thank all of you SO MUCH for your continuing enthusiasm for this story, and all of your amazingly kind reviews and support, asking me to please continue it and giving me LOADS of fantastic suggestions to continue it with! You are all awesome beyond belief, and I hope I can get to each and every one of your ideas. Because as soon as I read all of them, I started feeling inspired again! :D So many, many, MANY thanks to all of you! **

**This chapter is for PastelWinter, who left me absolutely awesome and far too kind reviews, and also gave me lots and lots of great ideas for new chapters. I combined several of your ideas together, hon, I hope you don't mind! :) Thank you for all of your support!  
**

**The suggestions of hers that I used were: Loki being alone in the Tower, Loki being confused by kitchen appliances, and Loki being confused by computers.  
**

**WARNING: LANGUAGE.  
**

**X  
**

He wakes suddenly, from a horrible, traumatic dream in which Agent Barton had trapped him in the elevator and was throwing bags of Skittles at him, laughing all the while in a horrible voice that sounded rather like one of the Chitauri.

He lies there trembling, the sheets pulled right up to his chin, eyes humongous in the morning light.

Clint's unnatural laughter still echoes in his ears. He does a quick check around the room for any signs of either Clint or Chitauri, making sure to stare long and hard at the shadow behind his dresser, and then sighs very quietly in relief.

He rolls over, curls on his side, watching the door and waiting for the usual thumping and swearing that is Tony dragging himself to the kitchen for his morning coffee.

Tony is not a morning person, rather like Loki himself. It's possibly the only thing they see eye to eye on.

Oddly enough, there isn't any thumping or swearing. No sound of the coffee machine either, which is usually started up by Steve, who is a very early riser.

_Come to think of it, there's no sound at all. _

The tower is eerily quiet. A chill runs down his spine, he doesn't really know why, and he gets up slowly and pads to the door, opening it a crack and peeking out.

No one. Just no one.

_Hmmm. This could be a trick. They have been known to play awful tricks on me. _

He waits for a bit, eyes darting around the empty living room, expecting someone to come out of the kitchen any moment. But no one.

He opens the door a tiny bit more and eases out through the crack, listening so hard he swears his ears are hurting.

As he crosses the living room and enters the kitchen – one of many in the tower – he notices a piece of paper on the counter.

Eyes narrowed, he picks it up gingerly between two fingers. There's a note scribbled on it in Tony's nearly indecipherable writing.

_Blitzen – _

_Gone to save the world again. Your bro's with us. We probably won't be back for lunch. I hope you can make your own breakfast or else – well, I guess you're shit outta luck. _

_Tony, and the rest of Earth's Mightiest Heroes_

Loki frowns at the paper for a long moment.

_Of course I can make my own breakfast, why would I not be able to? I have seen these sad humans use these devices enough times to know how, I am not a fool._

He stares at the counter, where sits the strange box which makes things warmer.

Also on the counter is the odd contraption in which bread disappears into, and comes back out crispy. He has never seen this happen, but Thor has told him about it reverently, several times.

There is also the giant white box – the one that looks like a trap – which cooks things both on top of itself and inside itself, but he has to admit he's a little too scared to try that one. So no eggs.

_Damn. I had felt like eggs this morning, too. _

He sniffs airily.

_Nevermind. I will have Thor's favourite, the Tarts that Pop._

He opens several cupboards, shoving aside colourful boxes of Tony's favourite breakfast food, Froot Loops, before finding a huge selection of Pop Tarts.

Strawberry, raspberry, blueberry, chocolate fudge, s'mores (he knows these to be Tony's favourite, as he always seems to be eating one), strawberry milkshake, chocolate chip... the list goes on and on, including Thor's favourite, rainbow cookie.

The vast selection is slightly overwhelming, and he taps the counter thoughtfully, finally deciding to try brown sugar and cinnamon, which looks harmless enough – not like the strawberry milkshake, which is a very bright, horrendous shade of pink.

He takes down the box, opens it and is pleased to find that two of these so called Tarts are included in each shiny silver package.

But now is the scary part.

He eyes the bread-crispening contraption warily.

It looks harmless enough, shiny and black with two little handles on the front and a long thing at the back, which Loki knows is meant to be stuck into the wall to receive electricity.

_Humans... I must give them credit for some things. _

He gingerly picks up the two-pronged plug and inserts it into the wall, leaning back a little just in case. Nothing happens.

Feeling a little braver, he examines the front of the machine, sees the little downward pointing arrows next to the handles, and he carefully drops the Pop Tarts into the little slots and pushes down the handles. The inside of the machine starts to glow, and, using simple logic, he guesses this is supposed to happen.

Loki leans back, smiling.

_All these fools have underestimated me, as usual. I can take care of myself, regardless of what everyone – especially Thor – believes._

He leans over the machine, interested, and suddenly there is a loud, metallic sound and the Tarts fly directly at his face.

Crying out in shock, he leaps at least two feet in the air, bangs his head on the bottom of the cupboard, and dives for cover behind a chair.

He watches, trembling, for a couple of minutes, but the Tarts do nothing more, they just sit there innocently in the machine.

Feeling irritable now, Loki gets up and edges back toward the counter, rubbing the top of his head. The machine is no longer glowing, and the Tarts smell rather good.

_You fool, Loki! Of course they must spring up after. How else would you get them back out? _

Annoyed at himself, he yanks the Tarts out of the machine, burning himself in the process, and tosses them carelessly onto a plate sitting nearby.

_Curse these strange machines! They did not have to make them so loud and unpredictable._

He grabs the plate and starts to sit at the table, then stops.

_Stark said they probably would not be back before lunch... Never have I been alone, unwatched by their tireless eyes. If there ever was a time to explore, it is now. _

He carries his plate back into the living room, and –

"Ahh."

Sitting on the small table in front of the couch is something that Loki has long wondered about – Tony's strange, flat, unfoldable machine which is called a _laptop, _and which Tony has forbidden him to ever touch.

His exact words were actually _"Lay a finger on this, and I'll personally make sure you don't have any more fingers to lay anywhere. Got that?" _

_But Tony is not here right now, and how will he ever know?_

Loki has been fascinated by the strange device for a long time. It seems to show any random picture Tony asks it to, and occasionally he has seen moving pictures on it just like the 'TV', and sometimes Tony uses it when he wants to make a certain type of food and his lady friend 'Pepper' is not nearby to instruct him how to.

To find whatever knowledge you desire on such a small machine seems nearly impossible, and definitely magic, and magic is something that Loki sorely misses.

He considers for a few more moments, and then makes a decision.

He carries his plate to the couch and sits down, absently chewing one of the Tarts, which is rather tasty actually, and runs slightly timid fingers over the sleek silver laptop.

He has seen Tony open it before, and he finds the thin line around the middle and pulls it upward, now facing a blank black screen.

Pop Tart forgotten on the plate, Loki's eyes rove hungrily over the many keys and buttons before him.

"I will learn your secrets, strange machine, make no mistake," he whispers, and presses the largest button available.

With a small whirring noise, a picture appears - four small coloured squares, and then a blue screen. In the middle is a small picture of Tony, wearing a huge foolish grin and pointing towards Loki.

Loki sneers and shakes his head, then looks toward the small white rectangle below Tony's picture.

"Password," he murmurs, biting the tip of his finger thoughtfully. Actually, it's not that hard to figure out – it must be some sort of device to protect the laptop from anyone other than Tony using it.

Loki sighs, frustrated at being held up when he is so close to his goal.

_Come now, Loki. You are much more clever than these ridiculous humans. You should be able to outsmart Tony Stark. What word would he use? _

He hesitates. If Tony used any of these strange symbol keys, there is no hope. But if he used the letter keys... Loki stares at Tony's irritating picture and tries to think like the billionaire.

_What is he most proud of? _

Obviously the Iron Man suit, but that's far _too_ obvious.

He tries typing out 'Iron Man' anyway, with no luck.

He then tries 'I Am Iron Man', which he has heard Tony say much too many times, but it doesn't work either.

He tries 'Avengers', just because, and then 'Tony Stark' and then even 'AC/DC', which is the name of Tony's very strange favourite musicians, but still nothing works.

He's just about ready to throw the whole damn laptop off the table when suddenly, a thought occurs to him.

_You told yourself to think like Tony Stark... but you are not, Loki. Tony Stark is a scientist before he is a super hero. Think like a scientist. He is most proud of the Iron Man suit, but the suit is not really made out of iron, is it? The scientist part of Tony would not call the substance his suit is made of 'iron'. What was it Tony said it was actually made of? He mentioned it only the other day._

His mouth twisting into a devious smirk, Loki types in 'Gold Titanium Alloy Man' and –

"Finally," he whispers, clenching his fists in victory.

The little picture of Tony disappears, and he is met with a photo of a shiny automobile, and several small pictures along the left side of the screen.

He grins triumphantly, then glances quickly at the door, struck with a sudden worry that Tony will have sensed his laptop being used without his permission and have come straight home, but the door stays closed.

He bites his lip and studies the screen closely. _What now?_

There is a tiny white arrow in the middle of the screen, and Loki has watched Tony use this machine often enough to know how to use the black square for moving it. He carefully selects 'Internet' and watches with wide, entranced eyes as it opens a whole new square and then

"CONGRATULATIONS!" a voice roars. "YOU WON!"

Loki gives a shout of horror and clears the back of the couch in his desperation to get away, sending the Pop Tarts flying.

Shaking, he kneels behind the couch and peers over the back at the screen, which now has a horrible flashing yellow face in the center.

"CONGRATULATIONS, YOU WON!" it hollers again in a voice as loud as the Allfather's when he is angry.

Loki cowers back, clutching the back of the couch in terror.

"CONGRATULATIONS, YOU WON!"

"Be gone, Yellow Face!" he cries in desperation. "I did not mean to anger you!"

This makes no difference whatsoever, in fact Yellow Face begins flashing faster, and then suddenly a loud roaring explodes from the laptop.

Loki shrinks behind the couch and presses himself flat against it, shuddering, eyes like saucers.

Strange music and sounds of machines fill the room, another booming voice accompanies the Yellow Face now, shouting something about a war, and then -

"CONGRATULATIONS, YOU WON!"

"Stop!" Loki pleads, pressing his hands over his ears.

"TOUGH STAINS?" A third voice shouts. "HERE COMES MR. CLEAN!"

"Nooo!" Loki pulls his knees up, curling into a ball behind the couch. "Do not send Mr. Clean!"

There's a loud bang suddenly, and heavy footsteps.

"What the _hell?_" Tony's voice, and then the footsteps are right in front of the couch, and the horrible voices get quieter.

Loki doesn't move, he just sits there and shivers, quite in shock.

"Um, what happened?" Natasha's voice.

"Don't ask me! I got here the same time you did."

More clunking steps, it sounds like Tony's still in the suit. Then, "Loki? Huh. Where is he? Had to be him that did this. Check his room."

More clunking, and then "Hey, what are you doing sitting back here, Rudolph?"

Loki barely glances at him, he's still shaking in fear.

Tony's feet come closer.

"Uh, you okay? You look a little freaked. What happened? Computer scare you?" He sounds like he's going to laugh, but when Loki still doesn't respond, he stops. "Huh."

His feet disappear.

Moments later – "BROTHER? ARE YOU HURT, BROTHER?" Thor sounds frantic, his feet come pounding across the floor like a titan, the whole floor shakes.

"I told you he's not, he just scared himself. His own fault," Tony chuckles. "Shouldn'tve been messing with my stuff."

Thor drops on his knees beside Loki, who finally looks up, relief flooding him at the sight of his big brother. Thor is dusty and even a little bloody, but it is THOR, good, familiar Thor.

"Brother! What in Odin's name? What has happened to you?" Thor grabs him in a bear hug, nearly squashing the breath out of him. "Loki, I did fear leaving you here alone! But all of these fine humans seemed to deem it safe. It is now obvious they were wrong."

Safe in Thor's arms, Loki starts to come back to himself a little. "Th-there was a horrible voice," he stammers as they stand up. He glances at the now silent computer, where Yellow Face still flashes ominously.

"It told me I won something! I feared the worst. And – and there were sounds of a battle! And a man called Mr. Clean is on his way! I do not know when he will arrive."

Shuddering, he turns his face to Thor's shoulder.

"WHO IS THIS MR. CLEAN WHO THREATENS MY BROTHER?" Thor roars, pointing a furious finger at the laptop. "Do not fear, Loki, we will crush the life out of him when he comes."

There's a funny sound, Loki looks around and sees Tony, red in the face from laughing so hard, his hand over his mouth, he's trying his absolute best to make no sound.

Natasha, who is standing by the door, is smiling just a little.

Thor gives them both a long and unimpressed look. "Friends, this is no time for levity. A being has threatened my brother, he is on his way. It is good you still wear the suit, friend Stark."

"So I can kill poor – poor innocent Mr. Clean?" Tony gasps, slapping the leg of his suit he's laughing so hard. "What's he gonna threaten your brother with, a sponge?"

"I DO NOT UNDERSTAND YOUR HUMOUR!" Thor bellows, and he lets go of Loki and marches to the laptop. "Who is this flashing Yellow Face? Tell him I wish to communicate. He must call off his agent of darkness!"

"Okay, okay." Tony has finally managed to stop laughing, and he moves toward the computer.

Loki stands behind the couch and watches with wide eyes, his hands still shaking.

"Mr. Clean is just a cartoon guy, he's not real. You just heard a commercial for his cleaning products, Baby Bro."

Loki looks at him blankly. "A commercial?"

"Oh jeez. Whatever, look, he's not gonna come here, and he's _definitely_ not gonna hurt you. As for Mr. Flashing Face here, he's just a stupid ad." Tony clicks something on the computer, the face disappears.

Loki lets out a breath of relief. "But... why was it so loud? It is never so loud when you use it."

"Becauuuuse, I had the sound turned up from the other night when I was listening to music." Tony rolls his eyes, turning to Thor. "You know your precious bundle of joy over there broke into my computer? Actually, he didn't even need to break in, cause he guessed my password." Tony shoots him a shrewd look.

Loki crosses his arms defensively. "It was pathetically simple. You could have been less obvious. A child could have guessed it."

"Watch it, smart ass." Tony points at him. "You weren't so high and mighty a few minutes ago, cringing behind my couch." He chuckles.

"Enough," Thor rumbles, holding up his hand. "Loki, you are safe, and that is all that matters. Friend Stark, my brother has always been exceptionally smart. I am not surprised he broke into your Box of Wisdom. Perhaps you should not have left it out where he could use it."

Loki gives his brother a genuine smile as Tony frowns. "Whatever. Big Brother's obviously gonna be on your side. You better clean up this mess though. Jeez, wasting my Pop Tarts, screwing up my computer... we are so never leaving you alone again. Man, I'm starving." He clunks away into the kitchen.

Thor sighs. "You did give me a fright, brother. I am glad to see it was nothing but a strange flashing face."

He leans down and picks up the slightly crumbled Pop Tarts.

"These are still good, of course. Would you like one, brother?" He begins eating the piece he picked up with a look of ecstasy on his face.

"No thank you." Loki wrinkles his nose slightly. "I think I have probably lost my taste for that kind."

"Not I." Thor chuckles heartily. "Ah, these are quite certainly made in some godly place, not Earth."

"AND, he forgot to unplug the TOASTER!" Tony yells from the kitchen.

X

**Hmmm... maybe Loki wouldn't have known how to use the alphabet to spell out "Gold Titanium Alloy Man"? When I think too much about it my brain starts feeling scrambled. Ahahaha.**

**Please leave me a review and let me know what you thought, and thank you for reading! :)  
**


	6. Chapter 6

**So, I'm back! Huge apologies for the long hiatus, but I've been doing nothing lately except working and trying to get into college. Ugh. **

**I don't know how long I'll be back for, but with Halloween coming up and all, this chapter just waltzed into my head and wouldn't go away. And I really did miss writing this story! **

**This subject was actually suggested to me a while back by an anonymous reviewer, so, if you're still reading, this one's for you! :)**

**I feel like this one got a bit Talking Heads on me, but I still kind of like it, and I hope you will too :) I also didn't spend a whole lot of time on it, so if there's any errors, please try and overlook them.  
**

**WARNING: LANGUAGE.  
**

**X  
**

It's actually quite nice, sitting here quietly, watching this film with Captain Rogers.

They haven't spoken at all, Loki had just wandered into the room where Steve was watching TV and sat down, because honestly he had nothing better to do. Thor is off somewhere doing Odin knows what, and Loki's been bored all day.

Steve had shot him a curious look from the big squishy leather chair, but hadn't said anything, and Loki had simply curled up on the couch and that was it.

"_What do you want me to do, John? You want me to let you run out of here, see how far you can get?"_

"_Why would you do such a foolish thing?" _

There's a curious hot feeling behind Loki's eyes.

_I am not crying. Why would I be crying? _

"..._that it was my job? My job?"_

There's a lump in his throat. Loki stares at the screen incredulously. Never has something not real made him cry before. How inconceivable.

"BROTHER!"

Loki jumps a foot off the couch, and he hears Steve swear, which is a rare thing. "Curses! What _is _it, Thor?"

Thor appears in the doorway, his blond hair carefully combed, a bright smile hitched in place.

"Brother! What are you doing?" He catches sight of Steve, and his grin gets even wider, if that's possible. "Captain Steve! You do not know how it pleases me to see my brother out of his room and enjoying life! I do not know how you accomplished this great feat, but I owe you a great debt."

He strides across the room powerfully and sits beside Loki.

Loki can only gape at him furiously. "What is your reason this time for charging in here like an oaf?"

The movie is going on without him in the background, and Loki hates to admit it, but he does not want to miss it.

"Friend Stark has informed me of a great and festive party," Thor replies, his white teeth glinting. "We must go out and find things to prepare for it! It does sound like great fun!"

"What in Odin's name do you speak of?" Loki rolls his eyes skyward. "What infernal plan has Stark come up with now?"

"Yeah, what are you talking about?" Steve switches off the TV, ending any chance of Loki finding out what will happen in the movie. "What festive party?"

"A great and fun night of partying and dressing in festive clothes!" Thor booms. "Apparently we must all dress as something other than ourselves! I must say, I find this idea rather intriguing. Apparently this party happens every year! It is called..."

Thor pauses, suddenly completely lost, his smile vanishing slowly, and then just as quick he hauls it back into place. "I cannot recall the name at this time! But I am sure it will return to me at a later date. Nevermind that. We must..."

"You mean Halloween?" Steve raises his eyebrows.

Thor leaps from the couch, making them both jump again. "That is it! Friend Steve, you are a god among men. Hollow Ween, that is its name."

"Halloween," Steve says again.

Loki glares at him. "Are you planning on explaining this idiotic sounding party, or are you just going to keep its meaning to yourself?"

He's really feeling rather annoyed, a vast change from his calm, relaxed demeanour a few minutes before. Everything on this planet – mostly the people – are enormously frustrating. And he's missing his movie.

"Halloween, it's when kids dress up in costumes and go out and get candy. The adults don't do that though, we go to parties." Steve shrugs.

"Yes indeed, parties!" Thor chuckles heartily. "'Party' is indeed my favourite word. Come, Loki, we must find ourselves costumes." He reaches down to grasp Loki's arm, and Loki jerks back.

"Do not touch me, Thor. I have no wish to be part of your moronic party. You go and make a fool of yourself, it will be nothing new to you anyway."

Thor booms out a laugh, and hauls him bodily to his feet. "I will not attend this party without you, brother! You do not wish to spoil my fun, do you?"

Loki can't help but laugh. "Indeed, Thor, that is all I ever wish to do!"

"You do love to jest. Come, Stark has offered to drive us all to get our costumes." Thor pulls him from the room.

X

Twenty minutes later, he's trapped in a large, very bright building, filled with a vast assortment of terrifying looking things and Agent Barton, Agent Romanoff, Tony Stark, Bruce, Steve, and of course Thor, who can't stop beaming around at everyone.

Ferocious looking masks hang from the walls, great hanks of multi-coloured hair are stuffed in bags, and stupid looking costumes are all over the floor and walls.

"What is this costume?" Thor picks up a blue one with fake muscles, a large 'S' on the chest. "What does the letter stand for?"

"Nobody's wearing that." Clint drops the costume casually to the floor. "I think I might go as Legolas this year."

"Yeah, not like you go as that _every _year, or anything," Natasha mutters, and Clint frowns at her.

"Do you know how much that blond wig cost me? I'll wear it as often as I damn well want to."

Natasha shrugs. "Well I'm not going as Arwen this year, so you can forget it."

"Let's leave these two lovebirds alone. Baby Bro, Sunshine Man, let's go find you costumes." Tony's arm clamps around Loki's shoulders, pulling him along, and Thor follows readily.

"This place is outstanding, friend Stark! What will you wear?"

"Oh, I'll probably be a pimp or something." Tony waves his hand. "I look good in anything, anyway. The challenge is going to be _you_, Catman. Cause I'm getting a _feeling..." - _he pauses at a wall of spangly outfits, then moves on – "...you're not going to wear just anything."

"A truer word was never spoken," Thor booms in long-suffering tones. "My brother is impossible to please."

Loki, silent up until now, has had enough. "Oh, do curb your whining, Thor! _I _am hard to please? What about you, dear brother? '_Ooooh, this cloak is not the right shade of red. My wine doesn't taste right. My pillow is too soft.' _Speak for yourself!" He shoves Tony's arm off his shoulders and glares at them both.

"I will not wear some ridiculous _costume. _If I am _forced _to attend your pointless party, I will wear my own perfectly acceptable clothes. After all," he says silkily, "Everyone will think I am dressing up anyway, am I mistaken?"

Tony stares back at him for a long time, his dark eyes unreadable, and then - "Ummm okay smart ass. Not if it's a party with just us. We'll know you're not dressed up. Now what?"

"A party with just _us_?" Loki sneers. "How pathetic."

Thor's face falls. "It will just be us? What of the city-wide party you boasted of, friend Stark? It is no longer occurring?"

"Oh it will, don't worry Hammer Time. I just figured your little bundle of joy here wouldn't want to attend, so... we decided to organize a little shindig for just the Mickey Mouse Club."

Tony grins, and chucks Loki under the chin. "Sorry. Your great comeback just flopped. What else you got?"

Loki grabs Tony's hand furiously. "Never touch me in that manner again, you fathomless fool! I do not need magic to kill you!"

"Okay. Thanks. Can I have my hand back now, or are you starting to like it?" Tony wheels around and heads down an aisle.

Thor eyes his seething brother silently. "Come, Loki, can you not at least try to enjoy yourself? This party sounds as if it will be highly enjoyable. I, for one, intend to party as if it were my own personal birthday."

"Oh, how fantastic." Loki shoves him aside, glaring. "So I can look forward to being embarrassed by you all night, like at your twenty-fifth? I shudder at the very memory."

Thor looks uncomfortable. "That was two long years ago, Loki. Must you continually remind me?"

Before Loki can reply, Bruce appears, looking uneasy. "Hey, guys. Where's Tony? I think it's time I get out of this place. It's a bit stuffy."

"Friend Stark is down there," Thor points. "I have not found a costume yet, friend Bruce! Will you assist me?" He smiles hopefully.

"Uhh, no. Maybe you can get Clint to help you, I'm gonna go get some air." Bruce hurries down the aisle looking slightly green.

Thor takes a deep breath, hitching on a brave smile. "Loki, I will now find a costume. You can either help me look, or you can just sit here and wait. It is your choice."

Loki crosses his arms. He can feel himself pouting. He doesn't want to help Thor look for some moronic costume, but to sit here and sulk would be petulant and child-like.

"I will sit here." Loki sits down on a tiny bench by the costume boots, arms still crossed. "Go and be a fool, it is your natural state, anyway."

Thor sighs loudly, and a wig falls from the wall a few feet away. "Fine. Be that way, brother."

"I will, thank you." Loki glares at the floor.

X

A half an hour later, his brother returns, booming with laughter and followed by the other Avengers and one very flustered looking shop assistant who can't stop giggling.

_Pathetic humans. _

Loki arranges his face into a grumpy look quickly to hide the fact he's actually rather relieved that they're back. Sitting on this chair for _forever_ has been near torture.

"Brother!" Thor grabs him in a hearty hug, as though they have not seen each other in long months.

"Do _stop_, Thor! I cannot breathe!" Loki squeaks, shoving his brother off. "Can you not stop your foolishness for one single moment?"

Thor ignores him, brandishing a shiny bag. "I have found my costume, with the help of Agent Barton! Look, brother!"

Loki, interested in spite of himself, looks. "What is it?"

"It's a caveman outfit," Clint replies, a wide grin plastered on his face. "I think it's perfect."

"I know not what a caveman is, but I do like the costume!" Thor flashes a bright smile at the leopard-patterned outfit. "It even comes with a club, Loki! It is perfect."

"Everybody ready to buy?" Tony calls.

Loki hunches down a little, hoping Tony will simply forget he doesn't have a costume yet. But Tony's eyes land right on him, and he doesn't say a word, he just heads up to the front of the store, followed by the others. Thor loops an arm around Loki's shoulders and hauls him forward.

Loki is in a state of shock. Tony, for _once_, has left him alone. Not made him be involved in something foolhardy and ridiculous. He's almost scared. Thor seems unconcerned, however.

"I look foward to this party more and more, brother! We have nothing so enjoyable in Asgard, do we? Any time we dress up as something other than ourselves we dress as grand animals, or the gods of old! Nothing so fun as this! In fact..."

Thor rambles on, but Loki is barely listening. He allows himself a tiny smirk – maybe, just _maybe_, these imbeciles have finally understood that he has absolutely no desire to be invovled in their idiocy. It's almost too much to fathom.

X

In the lead up to the party, Loki is more and more grateful that he will have nothing to do with this appallingly stupid idea. Thor annoys him daily by putting on his costume and wearing it around the tower, chuckling heartily over how light the club is and how much the leopard print animal skin suits him.

"It's a good look," Natasha says as she walks out of the kitchen. She shoots a _Come on, you can be a little nice _look at Loki, who glares at her with the deepest loathing.

"My brother looks like a fool, which is nothing new. He has spent his entire life looking this way. And no, I do not think it is a good look." Loki slouches on the couch miserably. Even after all this time, he still wishes he knew how that movie with the mouse ended.

"Two days to our little _soiree_," Tony says loudly, sauntering into the room holding a soldering iron. "Perk up, Old Misery. You look like you just found out you didn't conquer New York City after all."

Clint, who always seems to be around to snicker annoyingly, snickers annoyingly from the hallway.

X

"Tonight, dear brother!" Thor is already in costume, holding his stupid plastic club over his shoulders. "The party is tonight! I cannot wait. It is actually a good thing friend Stark scheduled this party instead of the big one, for I am expected back in Asgard in the morning. But tonight, Loki, I will enjoy this party to the very limit of my capabilities!"

Loki makes a face. "Remind me not to attend." Although really, he is actually happy the party is finally here, so he can stop hearing Thor rant on and on about it.

Thor roars with laughter, crushing him into a hug even as he starts to protest. "Brother, you do amuse me! Come, let us go see the others' costumes!"

"I can think of nothing I look foward to more," Loki intones dryly, hauling the neck of his jacket back into place. Still, he follows his brother into the elevator – the party is taking place on the top-most floor of Stark Tower.

"I wait with baited breath to see the party room," Thor grins. "Stark has been so very secretive about its appearance!" He's almost bouncing with excitement, which makes the elevator feel ten times more unsafe.

But it finally stops, and as they step out, they both give a shout of horror. A human skeleton swings down directly into Loki's face, accompanied by a shrill cackling and glowing red eyes, and he leaps back into the wall in terror.

"Be gone, evil demon!" Thor shouts, and with a roar of rage he rips the skeleton from above them, throwing it across the room into the back of Steve's unsuspecting head.

"What the _hell _was that all about? Do you know how much this damn thing cost me?" Tony gapes in horror at the crumpled up skeleton, whose head seems to have disappeared somewhere along the way.

Thor gathers his trembling brother from the floor, blue eyes narrowed furiously. "It attacked us, friend Stark! Why would you pay for its services unless you knew it was safe?"

"Um, forget it." Tony looks sadly down at the remains as the two brothers exit the elevator once again.

Loki doesn't even care that he is clamped tightly against Thor's side. The whole room is dimly lit, and there is horrifying wailing coming from all around. "Someone is being tortured," Loki whimpers, grasping the front of Thor's costume desperately. "I do not wish to be here any longer!"

Thor's blue eyes are narrowed, and he looks gravely concerned. "Friend Stark, you did not tell me people were going to be hurt at this party. I was not aware that your annual celebration involved this kind of thing. My brother and I will take our leave now." He heads for the elevator, his grip tightening on Loki's arm.

"Hey, hey, what are you _talking _about?" Tony, who is not dressed as a pimp after all but as an elaborate pirate, hurries over. "Hold your damn horses, there's nobody being tortured. It's just a freaking _tape_."

"What is this 'tape' you speak of?" Thor asks suspiciously.

Loki peers timidly from around Thor's neck as Tony crosses to a large black box and presses a button – the wailing stops.

"It's just a recording," Tony says, rolling his eyes. "You guys are too damn jumpy, I swear. There's nothing to be scared of, Eyes. Calm yourself."

"You mean it was _fake?"_ Loki spits, pulling away from Thor a little. "Do you see someone being tortured as _entertainment_, you hideous man?" He's all trembly, and it's all Tony's fault.

"Actually, when it was recorded _for_ entertainment purposes, yes I do see it as entertainment, Officer. Jeez." Tony walks away, and Loki follows his retreat with furious eyes.

Steve, who is dressed as a football player, gets up from the couch. "Hey, Tony, don't forget about that thing. Remember?"

Clint, nearly unrecognizable in green tights and a long blond wig, guffaws loudly. "Yessssss!"

Thor and Loki look back and forth between the two of them silently. "What thing?" Thor asks, eyes still narrowed.

Bruce, dressed unimaginatively as a doctor – in fact, he looks as though he came straight from his lab – edges toward the door. "Ohhh. Yeah. That thing. Maybe I don't want to be around for that."

Tony's face splits into a huge grin. "I almost _did _forget about it! Thanks, Cap. Hey, Baby Bro, come with me for a minute."

"No," Loki replies promptly. _Something vindictive is about to go down, and I will not be involved in any way. _

X

"Just wear them, dude. You're driving me nuts. Just put the freaking things on. You look like we're asking you to wear a frilly pink dress, or something. You're really killing me. Just _put them on!"_ Tony's eyes are getting bigger and bigger and just a teeny bit angry.

"I refuse." Loki stands firm, arms crossed, unmoving. _I will not be made a fool of again. _

"Okay," Tony says, a teeny smirk appearing on his face. "Wear them, or I'll turn back on that tape again. And play it allllll night long."

Loki glances at Thor, who shrugs helplessly, even though he's smirking just a little bit.

And so it happens that Loki attends the party wearing black cat ears, and that's that.

X

**So... good? Bad? Ugly?**

**Do tell, please! :)  
**


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